She did nothing for Father's Day..........again! A nice guy's complaint.

I understand that discussing this topic might stir some emotions and hurt some feelings, but it's important to address a pattern I've noticed: many well-intentioned individuals find themselves feeling neglected on special occasions, like Father's Day or their birthday, by their partners. Rather than blame the partner, it's time to take a closer look at our own actions and mindset. I am intentionally posting this 10 days before Father’s Day……….so you have time to do something different this year. 

Every year, I see a wave of disappointment expressed by men in various men’s group online. They recount how, once again, their special day passed without acknowledgment from their significant other. The disappointment is real, especially when compared with the effort these same men put into celebrating their partner's occasions. (Often going overboard in a nice guy unattractive way) This recurring theme speaks to a deeper issue – a need for introspection. 

It's essential to recognize that playing the victim only perpetuates the cycle. Your partner's actions, or lack thereof, are not the problem; it's your response to them that matters. If someone consistently demonstrates a disregard for your special days, it's time to heed Maya Angelou's advice: "When somebody shows you who they are, believe them." 

Instead of dwelling on disappointment and wallowing in victimhood it's time to reclaim control. This begins with leading yourself. 

Start by asking yourself: What do YOU genuinely want to do to celebrate Father's Day? Whether it's fishing, attending a ball game, playing golf, or visiting the gun range, the choice is yours. Take ownership of your happiness. 

Once you've decided on your ideal celebration, consider who you want to share it with. Perhaps it's quality time with your children, time with buddies, or even a solo adventure. Notice that I intentionally omitted the option of including a partner who consistently overlooks your needs. 

If you desire a different outcome, YOU must be willing to take different actions. Before you can lead others, you must first lead yourself. This means prioritizing your well-being and happiness. 

I often hear concerns about upsetting the partner with these decisions. But ask yourself: Why fear upsetting someone who disregards your feelings and needs? Continuing down the same path will only yield the same results. It's time for a change with your mindset and attitude so you can have a change in outcome. 

Are you ready to take charge of your life?  

Are you prepared to show yourself the kindness and love you deserve?  

Are you ready to prioritize yourself? 

Are you ready to stop being a victim? 

This Father's Day presents an opportunity for you to make a positive course correction…..embrace it. 

So, how will you celebrate Father's Day this year? The choice is yours. 

Photo by Inzmam Khan