Suicide Is Painless

For some of you who remember M*A*S*H* and know trivia also know that the theme song is "Suicide Is Painless" by Johnny Mandel. I did know the name of the song, I am a trivia guy. But I couldn't have told you who wrote it or performed it.

Fellow coach Neal Greenspan recently posted how suicide is the biggest killer of men under 45. Around the globe, approximately 800,000 people die by suicide each year which is roughly one death every 40 seconds.

One person every 40 seconds!

Suicide is 4 times higher among males.

Contrary to the title of the song suicide is not painless except for the person taking their life if they do it effectively. If they are effective they will feel no pain and will quickly and quietly pass on.

But suicide is incredibly painful for all of the people you leave behind. Loved ones, especially children wondering why you left them. This is the kind of pain and suffering that can impact them for their entire life. Do you want to do that to your children?

Suicide is never the answer. (Unless you're a pedophile…enough said.)

Suicide impacts others in ways you won't even imagine. I'd like to say I've been immune to this but someone who worked for me in the National Guard killed themselves back in 1989 Sean R.

I was a sergeant and I honestly can't tell you anyone else's names from back then. But I can tell you Sean's full name and I can recount the last conversation I had with him when I ripped him a new asshole for something.

You read that right. I tore him a new asshole for something he did at drill that weekend and that following Wednesday he took a 30-06 rifle and blew his brains out.

He wasn't related to me but he was one of my soldiers and to say this caused me a lot of emotional pain would be an understatement. I was responsible for my soldiers.

I was incredibly fortunate that my sergeant was the detective investigating the suicide. Turns out Sean was depressed and depression impacts 20% to 25% of Americans 18 years old and up.

We did not know he was depressed and was on anti-depressants. He should not have had a gun in the house. Nobody knew. His roommates also said that the thing I chewed his ass about didn't bother him. It was the thing I told him not to worry about, which was failing his PT test. This caused him to have a really bad week and ultimately take his life.

I was grateful to find out that my last conversation of tearing him a new asshole wasn't what pushed him over the edge. Ironically, the thing that I told him wasn’t a big deal is what sent him down the dark hole.

If you're reading this and you're thinking about suicide you must talk to somebody. Reach out if you're part of our men's community and take it to the men. Do not listen to the voices in your head trying to convince you suicide is the easy and painless solution.

It is not.

No matter how bad it may seem it will get better and you are loved by people you may not even be thinking of. You matter and your life matters. Hard times pass.

You cannot make steel without applying a lot of heat…approximately 2500 degrees. The difficulties you are going through right now are the heat to help transform you into a stronger better man.

With the right help and one simple shift in your thoughts you will emerge from the darkness clearer and better than before.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255 and can be called any time 24 hours a day.